Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you all! There are no photos with this post as my personal christmas hasn't happened yet, the kids and I will do ours on New Years so I'll update again then.

The past two weeks have been a little rough, sickness (lost 10 pounds in 2 days!) and ex issues created a less than ideal pre chrismas mood. At one point I was sobbing uncontrollably while sitting in the dark on the couch (no one home thank goodness)

But , it is always darkest before the dawn and the dawn does come. If it ever doesn't then we'll be in a better place and it won't matter.

I am feeling better physically, expressed some of my frustrations (albeit loudly and with some course language), spent some quality time with my sisters and brothers and am feeling more hopeful about everything.

About my personal life...well, I'm not a speed dater! I was supposed to have my second date (different guy) on Sunday evening in Calgary but cancelled because I wasn't feeling well. But we email and talk on the phone once in a while...its still strange I have to say and sometimes I wonder if its really worth it but for now I press on...slowly but still on..... I'll keep you posted.

Beauty

My happy place

Baby at the beach

just past her in the darkness is the neverending expanse of sand and sea. there is nothing quite like a cuddle and bedtime story with the sound of smell of the sea in the background.

The cure for everything is salt water

Just let your cares float away in the sound of the waves, the smell of the salty air and the rhythm of the tides.

Christmas?!

This is an older christmas picture....our family has its own traditions which oddly enough include everyone blindfolded in the dark crawling around on the floor trying to put a flashlight together before you are killed by the Destroyer! A favourite for all ages!

This year is actually going to be a little different, Mom and Dad are heading to Nebraska for a long overdue visit and to meet their newest grandson. My kids are at Derek's from the 21st to the 30th so I"ve told work I can do extra shifts, Amy and Garron will be driving Ren to the airport on boxing day. We are getting together for a family dinner on the 23rd but that is it for plans this year.

Personally, my house is decorated and ready but I am not at all, just don't have any brilliant ideas this year. I have made it a practice for the kids and I to do something together instead of exchanging a lot of gifts but I'm drawing a blank this year.

This past week (actually 2 weeks) have been spent struggling with illness, and the ever present stress of finances. Just tired out and discouraged I guess. Needless to say that has also affected my view of my personal life...just not really interested in doing the work required to develop and explore new relationships. Plus I watched a great movie "Georgia Rules" that makes me rethink the whole idea of a stepfather! If you haven't seen it ---do it!

on the other hand my sweet and adorable daughter has it firmly in her mind that a 'new daddy" is the answer to everything and is quite vocal in her search....I have committed to praying about it with her but have amended the request to "another adult to help" this can include friendly grandmotherly types and takes some pressure off me.

Well, that's a short recap from me....I hope this finds you all well, ready for the holidays and enjoying life to the full. Amanda

Still Alive!

Well he wasn't an ax murderer ( I guess he could still turn out to be one but I'm being careful) We met at a local restaraunt (he wore his black australian cowboy hat so I'd recognise him) Over all I'd say it was a successful first date, no fireworks or heart thumping tension but that would have been a little scary. He was a nice, christian man trying to reach out to others the same way I am. We have agreed to continue to get to know one another but there is no commitment there, just a casual friendship which is great for now..... wish I had some funny cartoon or something to depict the scene but I don't , just use your imagination and thanks to those who have been so encouraging.

Back in the Saddle Again

O.K. friends and family, whether you like it or not you are invited to come along with me on my latest adventure. Be prepared for a wild ride (or to be bored out of your mind) either way I promise brutal honesty even if it makes me look like a complete idiot! (that should be worth a read don't you think?)

My goal this year was to allow my heart to be more open, allow myself to have feelings even at the risk of making mistakes and being hurt....Well I made my first mistake and got a little hurt but at the same time the experience has been good over all.....I had my first crush. It is embarrassing to even say that! but brutal honesty is what I promised! My new coworker/boss(bad start I know) has a lot of qualities I admire he is an incredibly hard worker, takes pride in his work and has fun at the same time, he is open and affectionate and wasn't scared off by my independance and "coolness" (by that I mean iciness not style)...I found I really enjoyed working with him and appreciated the attention he gave me....alas not all is as it should be..He is in a relationship and left this week to bring his family out west to live.... also there is no spiritual interest in his life and that is something I really don't want to compromise on...so to avoid the mistake of thinking he is the only one who will ever be interested in me, and with the advice of Dr. Henry Cloud(boundaries author) I have signed up with a reputable internet dating service (again, horrifyingly embarrassing to admit) I am now in communication with one gentleman on the west coast and have my first real date this afternoon! I have never gone out with someone I don't know...it is a little scary I have to admit but good for me. The focus is not to find that special someone at this time but to meet new people and practice my people and communication skills. Dating for fun not dating to find a mate..is how Dr. Cloud describes it..so here goes.

I will update occasionally but feel free to not read these if it bores you to tears. Mostly this is for my benefit and protection....the more open I am and honest with others the less opportunity there is to make poor choices and continue in unhealthy thinking patterns.

Favourite Things

Uncle Peter and the trampoline are still some of our favourite things! I got to go to one of Pete's games this week (my first since he's been playing college ball) Everyone was always complaining that he doesn't get enough time on the court but at this game he was on almost all the time! So exciting, even though they just lost at the end. Hope we didn't jinx him!

Our pets

Jake is still with us and enjoying life in Three Hills. He still loves his walks and escapes every once in a while but he has always come back!

Tyson was with us for a while as Jon's pup. After training him quite well Jon decided he would enjoy life on an acerage a little better so we will miss him but he did keep life interesting!

Campfire

This is one of my favourite things to do in our yard. I have even been known to get one going when the kids are away.(its all part of my work of course..I have been doing a lot of clearing of overgrown brush and trees and choose to burn it instead of hauling it away. so its not all fun and games)

first day of school

Here goes my baby off to grade one! I usually am gone in the morning before they wake up and the boys are doing a great job of getting Ocean ready and out the door on time...but for this day I went in to work late and went with her myself. She likes her teacher, is doing great and making friends!

Hogg Wild Corn Maze

It didn't look like much from the outside, but the corn was really over our heads and you could get quite lost(well, I could)


Below is a "maze inside the maze"....there were different points with games etc. even a 9 hole mini golf! This is a finger maze.

Thanksgiving Footbal

Grampa Andy and Ren (international student from Japan rooming with Amy and Garron) plan and execute our strategy.

Garron carries the ball and his team to a victory! Grampa Andy just couldn't cover his Man!

Post Game conference. This is one of my favourite ways to spend time with my family! The day was beautiful and the competition was fierce!

Our Home

Finally getting some pictures up of our home. The floor actually looks pretty good here but in real life it is in rough shape. My plan is to restore the hardwood throughout but first priority is to get the foundation fixed so we are level!





























This is Ocean's room. Small but cozy and she does a great job of tidying.

September!!!!!

Well, that was summer......I am always sad to see it end but I really think it was one of our best so far. Top of the list was the trip to the shore of course but we've also had a great time hanging out in our hammock in our yard. Did you know that this hammock can hold Me Jon Brad and Ocean. The trees stayed standing too. We had campfires in our fire pit and the boys spent alternate weeks working with Derek in calgary building decks and fences. Soon they should know enough to do some work on our house for me!

I was really concerned about leaving Heritage for a new job because I just couldn't imagine finding something that I ejoyed so much or that did as much for me personally but God is good. My job at the Chateau is fun, rewarding and satisfying. Thanks Lord.

The kids have started at the local public school....I think they will be fine.

I was invited to a small group at the home of one of the ladies I work with. It is just across the street which is super handy and they are a nice group but......I think I was being set up. They are all married couples except for me and....surprise, surprise, my friends 38 year old son. Mmmm...as I am working on being open this year I guess this will be good practice for me.and mom, he is a baker...not quite a cook but baker is close...actually he's a teacher but is only subbing......

that's about it for me

sunscreen hair

My roomate

auntie Erica came all the way from England to spend some time with us as well. What a brave and gracious lady! unfortunately we didn't have enough rooms to give her one of her own so the poor lady had to room with me and my snoring..sorry Erica. She however is a very quiet and tidy roomate, I definitely got the better deal there. She got the men out playing tennis every morning and got my boys watching Wimbledumb (that's what they called it but they did get addicted and we will be playing in Three Hills.) I surprised Brad with my natural athletic ability L.O.L

My kids favourite expression that they learned from Erica is "Are you telling Porky Pies?"said with and english accent of course.

Dad and hes girls. I love seeing Dad with his family of origin and I think he loves having them around.



He's also the best grampa and is so patient. The kids all love him. Thanks for that Dad.

some times you just have to live in the moment and even if you don't have a suit the waves will call your name. This evening was so beautiful and we just couldn't resist

Portraits

Amy and Journey


Mae and Mary

Amanda Jon Brad and Ocean